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  • Writer's pictureLilith Elektra

Dealing With Detours

So, you set your goals! You planted your seeds! You worked hard! And you still failed. What do you do now?

Let's start by getting rid of the word 'fail'. Failure is a vague word that means different things to different people. So let's just get rid of it. You don't fail, you try, learn and try again.

You're allowed to be upset, angry, or sad about the situation. You poured time and energy into what you wanted to do, so take the time to experience whatever feelings you have about what happened. You're feelings are not wrong and it is unfair to expect yourself not to feel them.

Once you're ready, consider what you learned from the attempt? Sometimes, we just weren't ready for success. We had our plan, we pushed ourselves and the time wasn't right. Maybe you needed to learn a new skill or be more realistic about your time frame. Sometimes we catch a bad break.

That's the thing with life- we don't know what lies ahead. We can make plans, plant seeds and start our journey, but we don't know what will happen along the way. There is no way for us to know what lies in front of us. Not achieving your goal on time is not failure.

What if you're going on vacation and your destination is a five hour drive away? Along the way you realize that you need to fill your tank with gas. You pull over, fill up the car, run inside and use the restroom, and then head on your way. As you go down the road there is an accident, and traffic is backed up. You spend time in a complete stand still, as traffic shifts from 3 lanes to one to get around the accident. Perhaps there is construction along the way and you have to take a detour. Then you see a restaurant that you really like and you're kinda hungry - so you pull over and get something to eat.

Well now you've hit the five hour mark and you're still 90 minutes from your destination. Have you failed? Do you pull over at the five hour mark and have your vacation at the Flying J off exit 152? Do you turn around, go home and go to work the next day and tell the boss you failed at vacation?

Maybe I don't really know what you'd do, but chances are you'd take into consideration everything that happened on the trip and keep driving until you arrived at your destination.

Life is the same way, we're on a journey, we're heading towards our goals, but there are things we don't know and things we have no control over. But just like those stops and delays on our car trip, the goal is to keep going. We acknowledge the detours and accidents and rest stops, we recalibrate our expectations, and continue on.

Think about a time you missed out on a goal.

What did you learn about yourself and about your goal?

How can you move forward with the information you learned?

What is your new approach to this goal now that you've been through some of the detours and delays?

Start setting your goals, or revisiting older goals, today! Contact me here to set up a free consultation and see how life coaching and keep you on track!


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